When it comes to leading change, one question often causes miscommunication, conflict, and false expectations. It can prevent insights and limit information.
Successful CEOs and change leaders don’t ask questions to confirm what they know. They ask to understand, gain insight, and make decisions.
Yet one common leadership question can unintentionally create confusion, set up false expectations, prevent insights and limit information. That question:
“Do you understand?”
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On the surface, questions like “Do you understand?” “Does this make sense?” or even “Do we all agree?” may seem logical and helpful.
But in practice, this question can actually limit communication and prevent leaders from discovering how people truly interpret information during times of change.
Why “Do You Understand?” Creates Problems
Many leaders have experienced the frustration of explaining a new initiative, receiving nods of agreement, and then watching people fail to follow through or act in ways that differ from expectations.
This exact challenge came up during a conversation with a CEO frustrated with a manager who seemed unwilling to implement important departmental changes. When I asked whether the manager understood the expectations and reasoning behind the changes, the CEO confidently said yes. She had asked him directly, and he had answered yes.
But understanding is far more complicated than a simple yes-or-no response.
The problem with questions like, “Do you understand?” “Does this make sense?” “Do we all agree?” is that they assume that the person answering the question has interpreted the information through the same filter as the person asking.
So, when they respond yes, it’s easy to assume they have interpreted the information as you intended. And assume you have a shared understanding.
In reality, no two people process information in the same way.
The Hidden Filters Shaping Understanding
Every person brings their own experiences, beliefs, assumptions, and context into conversations. Those filters shape how they interpret information, especially during organizational change.
As the saying goes: “We don’t see the world as it is; we see the world as we are.”
That lack of follow-through or different interpretation of instructions does not automatically indicate resistance to change. Often, it simply reflects a different understanding of the information provided.
When leaders assume everyone shares the same interpretation, it’s easy to become frustrated. Then you may label people unfairly as resistant, disengaged, or unwilling to change. Over time, this can create a toxic cycle of change for your organization.
The Leadership Lesson That Changed Everything
I discovered this in my own practice.
When I first started teaching my change management courses. I would ask at the end of each section:
Do you understand?
Does this make sense?
Most participants would nod yes.
One day, during a break, I heard one of the participants explaining a concept to another participant who had been away when I taught it.
As I listened to him explain the concept, it was clear his understanding was not what I wanted the participants to take away.
That’s when the light went on. I realized my question had satisfied me, but I didn’t really know what the participants understood.
So, what’s the alternative to asking, “Do you understand?”?
The Better Question Leaders Should Ask
Instead of asking closed-ended questions, ask an open-ended question that provides them an opportunity to process and reflect. It will give you insight into their perception, understanding, and interpretation. Then you can create a shared understanding.
Some powerful alternatives include:
- “What is your understanding of …?”
- “What does … mean to you?”
- “What will this look like in your role or organization?”
- “What is your takeaway?”
The one I tend to ask now is “What is your takeaway?” I like it because it encourages reflection and gives people space to process information in relation to their own context and experience.
How Open-Ended Questions Improve Change Leadership
Open-ended questions do more than clarify understanding. They also:
- Create shared understanding
- Reveal misunderstandings early
- Encourage reflection and insight
- Strengthen collaboration
- Foster healthier conversations around change
- Support sustainable organizational transformation
Interestingly, these conversations often generate insights that neither party considered before. When people explain their takeaway, they frequently connect ideas and perspectives in unexpected ways, creating opportunities for innovation and stronger alignment.
The Key to Healthier, Sustainable Change
Successful change leadership is not about pushing harder when people fail to respond as expected. It is about understanding how they interpret the message in the first place.
The questions leaders ask shape the quality of communication, trust, and collaboration throughout the change process.
So the next time you are leading a conversation about change, resist the urge to ask:
“Do you understand?”
Instead, ask:
“What is your takeaway?”
That single shift can open the door to deeper understanding, stronger alignment, and healthier, more sustainable change.
Schedule a Change Strategy Call with me today.
